Dating For Men
The general rule is:
1: Ask open-ended questions,
2: No sarcastic jokes,
3: Make it fun,
4: Say something memorable,
5: Fewer than 10 words (leave room for imagination),
6: Find a way to make the other person want to meet you (otherwise you are dating your phone),
7: If he says something you don’t like, give him a second chance,
8: Don’t argue,
9: Compliment him/her,
10: If he/she tries to tell a joke, laugh!
Ten recommended Emoji !
Near the end of every date there is an awkward moment when the waiter drops off the bill. My clients often struggle with the question of, “Who pays?”
For a first date, I believe that the standard is for the guy to pick up the bill, especially if he initiated. In general ladies put a great deal more effort into preparing for a date. But that doesn’t mean the lady shouldn’t “reach” for her handbag, or at least make a sincere offer to pay her share. If your date is a gentleman, he will politely decline and say that it is his pleasure. There are other ways to show mutual appreciation. If you have to wait for a table, perhaps the lady could buy the gentleman a drink at the bar first, or treat him to a post-dinner coffee or dessert at another place. Most guys will be impressed by your kind gesture and will happily pick up the dinner tab.
” It’s not all about looks in the dating world, but your first interaction with someone is heavily influenced by appearances, so you need to pay attention to what you wear and your physical presence .”
“Weight: Lets face it, It’s a weight-conscious world. That doesn’t mean that no one will want you if you are heavy, but it does mean that getting dates is easier if your weight reflects overall good health. Dating is a good motivator for setting up a healthy eating and exercise plan, which is invigorating, helps boost self-respect, and has health benefits. But don’t hesitate to begin dating just because you ‘re not at your best weight. Lots of people are in the same boat you ‘re in, looking for someone to love, and many will accept you just the way you are.”
–“Dating After 50 for Dummies”
Write down the measurable qualities of the person and relationship you are looking for. Focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want. Set a period of 3-6 months. Participate in as many events and meet as many people as possible.
Make friends with those you feel comfortable with. After a few months, you should have a handful of potentials. Once you get to know them better, check the list to see who is the most suitable candidate. Then spend more time with that person. For ladies, sometimes, men need very clear signs. If you like him, give him more hints. For gentlemen, if you like her, make sure she knows. Love can only be expressed through action.
1. Avoid religious and political discussions
You do not want your first date to end up as a debate session. If these topics happen to come up and you disagree with your date’s views, be diplomatic and gently shift the topic.
2. Avoid negative topics
Your date is not a tree hole for you to dump all your negativity and sorrow. Avoid talking about family problems or past bad relationships.
3. Don’t ask “Why do you use a matchmaker or dating app?”
Appreciate that he/she said “yes” and is here with you. No need to ask why. If you get asked, simply say, “Because I haven’t met the right person yet.”
4. Don’t turn your date into a business meeting
Try to keep shop talk as brief as possible. You should show an interest if your date is passionate about their work and willing to share, but try to keep the exchange brief.
5. How to expand the topics naturally
Every question is an opportunity to reveal something about yourself and to learn something about your date. A simple question such as, “Do you like to cook?” can extend to cover many related topics, such as your favorite dishes, where you learned to cook, your most memorable meal, etc. You can also take out your phone and share some photos and video of your cooking. (It is important to turn off your notifications because you don’t want messages to keep popping up.)
1. What if I am not enjoying our conversation?
Remember that it’s important to take something positive away from each date. Even if you don’t have much in common, it’s always nice to learn something new.
2. What’s the proper tone for dating conversation?
Speak clearly and slowly to show that you are confident and knowledgeable. Modesty and a sense of humor will go a long way.
3. Be positive
You are not a teacher, even if that’s your profession. Always bring positive energy into the conversation by saying things like: 1) Yes! 2) I agree; 3) Interesting; 4) Brilliant; 5) That’s fantastic
4. Introverts and extroverts
– If you are an introvert, try to shorten your thinking process, so that your date will not think that you’ve lost interest in the conversation.
– If your date is an introvert, you will notice that they do not talk much. But don’t worry, they are just processing what you are saying.
– If you are an extrovert, try to sum up what you want to say in your head before speaking out loud. Also, practice not to interrupt a conversation. Hold your thought until your date has finished his sentence.
1) Arrive early, so that you have some time to relax, have a drink and get in the mood.
2) Always hold a glass of wine in your hand. Hold it by the base of the stem, not the goblet.
3) There is a misperception that the guy should always initiate the conversation. Ladies, if you just walk up to someone with a smile and introduce yourself, he will be happy to engage in conversation.
4) If the person you’re talking to is not responding proactively, he/she may be an introvert. Give them a bit more time–it’ll be worth your effort.
5) Wear something brightly colored that your new friends will recall the next day.
6) If you set a goal of meeting at least 10 new friends, you will be more motivated to move around the room.